メタルエッチング・ポートレイトシリーズ
（フランスのスーパーや蚤の市等で気軽に入手できるありふれた缶詰や日用品、道端で拾ったフライパン、鍋等のアルミ調理器具、使い古しのアイロン等の金属素材をキャンバスにロック・スターを中心としたポートレイトをエッチング加工したシリーズ）
・・・数年前のことです。作品は全く売れず、何をやっても上手くいかず、SNSに投稿される日本の旧友たちのキラキラな日常と自身の現実を比較しては落ち込み、抱えていた鬱病も悪化、ダークで絶望的な自殺衝動を抑えながらの時期。
アジアン・レストランの厨房での仕事中、山積みの油まみれの鍋やフライパンを洗わなければならず、完全に気持ちを折られ泣きそうになっていた、とある夜のことです。
残飯まみれの汚れたフライパンの底に、どうしようもない境遇の惨めな自分の顔がシラけるほど眩しい厨房の蛍光灯の明かりに反射して写り込みました。そんな惨めな自分と目が合ったことが不快で咄嗟にフライパンを傾けると、写り込んだ自分の顔の斜め上から下へ豚肉のかけらが油で滑り落ち、稲妻のような軌跡を描きました。
それはまるで顔に稲妻のメイクを施したデビッド・ボウイのアルバムジャケット「アラディン・セイン」を彷彿とさせ、私はハッとしました。
「これだ！鍋の底にポートレイト？でも金属だからエッチングならどうだ？」と閃光の如く閃いたアイディアに体を震わせ、フライパンを天井に掲げ顔に油の滴や残飯が垂れようがボスに怒鳴られようがお構いなしにしばらくそのままのポーズで勝ち誇り、ほくそ笑んだのでした。
その夜を境に家中の鍋からスプーンやフォーク、水道の蛇口からトイレの水栓コック、電子レンジの側面まであらゆる金属を見つけては取り憑かれたようにエッチングの練習に費やしました。
冷房の効いた部屋でリラックスして足を組みながらグラフィックを描いているような余裕な仕事ぶりだったら決して思いつくことはなかったであろう芸当だと思い、ただでは痛い目に遭わないタフな自分は紛れもなく作品で闘う/あるいは作品のために骨身を削ることを厭わない「武闘派」芸術家であると自負した瞬間、私の執念が芸を産んだ瞬間です。「Let It Bleed - 血みどろになれ」とはそういう意味なのかもしれません。
そんな私の18年間のフランスでの活動を振り返る回顧展 "Let It Bleed" が渋谷宮下パークDayzにて残すところ数日ですが今月16日までの展示となっております。ご興味のある方はぜひお立ち寄りください。
最後までお読みいただきありがとうございました。
Metal Etching Portrait Series
(This series features etched portraits of rock stars on canvases made from common canned goods, household items easily found at French supermarkets and flea markets, discarded aluminum cookware found by the roadside, worn-out irons, and other metal materials.)
A few years ago, my life was in a really tough spot. My artwork wasn't selling, nothing seemed to be going right, and I found myself comparing the sparkle of my old friends' lives in Japan on social media to the grim reality I was facing. On top of all that, my battle with depression was taking a turn for the worse, and I was struggling with dark and despairing thoughts of suicide.
One night, while I was working in the kitchen of an Asian restaurant, tasked with scrubbing mountains of greasy pots and pans, I felt completely overwhelmed. It was a moment when I felt like I was on the verge of breaking down.
In the bottom of a dirty, grease-covered frying pan, I saw my own face reflected back at me in the harsh fluorescent light of the kitchen, and it looked even more miserable against the backdrop of my seemingly hopeless situation. Meeting the gaze of that wretched version of myself was so discomforting that I instinctively tilted the frying pan away. As I did, some bits of pork slid down from above my reflected face, leaving a lightning-like trail in the layer of oil.
In the bottom of a dirty, grease-covered frying pan, I saw my own face reflected back at me in the harsh fluorescent light of the kitchen, and it looked even more miserable against the backdrop of my seemingly hopeless situation. Meeting the gaze of that wretched version of myself was so discomforting that I instinctively tilted the frying pan away. As I did, some bits of pork slid down from above my reflected face, leaving a lightning-like trail in the layer of oil.
It was almost like a flashback to the album cover of David Bowie's "Aladdin Sane," where he had that lightning bolt makeup on his face. In that moment, it hit me like a lightning bolt – "This is it! Portraits at the bottom of pans? But they're made of metal, so why not try etching?"
I trembled with excitement at this idea that flashed like lightning in my mind. I raised the frying pan to the ceiling, not caring about the oil drops or food remnants that might land on my face. For a while, I stood there triumphantly, grinning like a Cheshire cat.
I trembled with excitement at this idea that flashed like lightning in my mind. I raised the frying pan to the ceiling, not caring about the oil drops or food remnants that might land on my face. For a while, I stood there triumphantly, grinning like a Cheshire cat.
From that night on, I became obsessed with practicing etching on every piece of metal I could find around the house – from spoons and forks in the kitchen to the faucets on the bathroom sink, even the side of the microwave. I was consumed by it, dedicating all my time to perfecting this craft.
If it had been a relaxed, graphic design job in an air-conditioned room with my feet up, I might have never stumbled upon this idea. But it was in the midst of this gritty, tough, and relentless battle with my art, where I proved to myself that I was an artist willing to fight tooth and nail for my work. In that moment, I recognized my determination had given birth to art. Perhaps "Let It Bleed - 血みどろになれ" means just that.
If it had been a relaxed, graphic design job in an air-conditioned room with my feet up, I might have never stumbled upon this idea. But it was in the midst of this gritty, tough, and relentless battle with my art, where I proved to myself that I was an artist willing to fight tooth and nail for my work. In that moment, I recognized my determination had given birth to art. Perhaps "Let It Bleed - 血みどろになれ" means just that.
The retrospective exhibition "Let It Bleed," which reflects on my 18 years of artistic activity in France, is currently on display at Shibuya Miyashita Park Dayz. The exhibition will run until the 16th of this month. If you're interested, please do visit.
Thank you for reading.
Thank you for reading.
#popart #contemporaryart #japaneseart #etchingart #lowbrow #rocknroll #terunoji
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